As loyal readers are aware, I sampled several careers before settling into my current R&D post here at Dyscern World HQ Labs. CIA analyst. Fashion model. New Zealand Poet Laureate. This sort of thing. For many years, I dabbled in the theater. I had a few plays produced Off Broadway in the 1940s. Well, Off-Off Broadway. Actually, if I am to be completely honest, the technical term would be Off14 Broadway.
 At any rate, I’ve been inspired to revisit my dramaturgical leanings of
late. Curiously, my muse has been the advent of texting, Twittering and
the various communication modalities available via our mobile devices.
I’m rather intrigued by the notion of composing radically distilled
dramatic works in this fashion. Who needs weighty manuscripts when you
can publish virtually to an audience of Blackberries and iPhones?
And so I present debut installment of our newest feature: Doc Sam’s 15 Second Theater. Enjoy.
15 Second Theater Presents
If Twitter Were Invented in 1909
JASPER and CONSTANCE GUNDERSON, Carolina homesteaders, sit on the porch
of their modest farmhouse. A CARRIER PIGEON alights upon the rail.
JASPER removes from the bird’s leg a rolled-up sheet of parchment.
CONSTANCE: What news is this?
JASPER: My dear, you will be astounded! You remember those fellows from
merry Frisco, with whom I matriculated at the Agricultural College?
Well, we correspond by carrier pigeon, you see. It allows us, after a
fashion, to remain intimately acquainted, even as we have settled
variously across the land.Why, with the speed of the racing pigeons, we are practically
neighbours again! We can exchange correspondence within the span of a
fortnight, provided the missive is succinct and epigrammatic. In honor
of the birds, we call it “twittering”.
CONSTANCE: Splendid, my dear! And what does the missive say?
JASPER: See for your-self!
CONSTANCE: (reading) “@Jasper: FYI UR a noob PITA!! JKBF! luv ya - Thaddeus”
JASPER: Oh-ho! A touch, I do declare it!
FINI
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