|
Virtual Worlds: A Cunning Plan |
|
|
|
Dr. Samuel Says -
Weirdness
|
|
Written by Dr. Samuel Centralia, Ph.D., D.D.S., Esq.
|
|
Friday, 18 December 2009 |
End-of-the-world scenarios seem to be on our collective mind these days. Recent films like “2012,” Cormac McCarthy’s “The Road” and the animated adventure “9” are upping the ante in the disaster flick category. Clearly, we are sublimating our collective anxieties about global warming, pandemics and terrorism.
 As always, I am prepared with a Cunning Plan. Here at Dyscern World HQ
Labs, I’ve set up a system that will ensure my survival in the event
of, you know, Armageddon. Should civilization end -- via virus,
radiation or ocean waves -- I plan to simply upload my personality as a
ROM construct to my favorite virtual world.
In other words, I’ve replicated my entire consciousness in binary code
(43 terabytes, if you’re interested) and have it stored in stasis
within my favorite -- secure and undisclosed -- MMORPG. That stands for
Massively Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game -- the industry’s most
unwieldy acronym. You know, Everquest, World of Warcraft, this sort of
thing.
I realize there are some logistical hurdles here. For starters, we’ll
need to bury the server farms along with several trillion batteries.
But I’m thinking big picture. Check out these virtual worlds listed
below, all of which are actual MMO games. (OK, all but one -- see if
you can spot the fake.) Which would you choose?
Club Penguin: Use your penguin avatar to waddle your way through various puzzles and games.
Urban Dead: Live forever fighting zombies as a human survivor, or eating brains as a zombie. Your call.
Monopoly City Streets: Buy and sell virtual real estate on real-world streets using Google Map images.
Toontown Online: Fight back against hostile corporate takeover by
deploying classic cartoon “gags” -- banana peels, seltzer bottles,
dropping anvils, etc.
Ran Online: Fight undead undergraduates from rival universities.
Continuum: Abandon the third dimension entirely and live forever in a frictionless 2-D cosmic world.
http://www.getcontinuum.com/
Third Life: Try, try again in a virtual world exclusively for those who
have managed to screw up both their real life and Second Life.
Sociolotron: Fight monsters, establish a dynasty and have virtual sex. (link NSFW)
Kingdom of Loathing: Fight monsters, establish a dynasty and get drunk. (link barely SFW)
Hello Kitty Online: Help Hello Kitty fight a “mysterious and malevolent power.”
Monster Farm Online: Breed and raise specialized monsters, then fight them.
Pirates of the Burning Sea: Swashbuckle your way through the Caribbean circa 1720.
Tantra Online: Help your tribe defeat monsters from Hindu mythology.
Blackout Rugby: Manage a virtual New Zealand rugby team until the end of time.
* Third Life isn’t real, although it should be -- too bad some cybersquatter is sitting on the domain.
Trackback(0)
 |
TrackBack URI for this entry
Show/Hide comments
Show/Hide comment form
